Thursday, November 20, 2008

Life's choices

Today I realized how much I was mistaken about my weight issues. I always thought that "all I had to do" to lose weight was eat less and expend more energy daily. Simple right? The bottom line is, in fact, less calories/more energy. But I know now how much my food issues are tied into some many other aspects of my life.

For example, I do not make the time each week to make a shopping list, shop, chop and plan meals. Instead I eat fast food, freezer meals or make dinner plans with others. (which leads me to not be a good steward with my finances)

I do not plan my exercise for the week. And if I do, I usually allow myself to be inticied by other social activities. (which again does not make me a good steward of money and time)

I do not like to be alone at home. I used to, but I think I feel more worthy if I am busy. So I fill up my days with friends/family/bible studies..anything to avoid being alone. These things are not bad in themselves, but sometimes I feel so overextended that I miss out on my ''rest'' with Him. (bad steward of time management)

Which the above things leads me to be tired. I am exhausted and anxious, then I turn around and eat. I stay up too not sleep properly which is not good for me physically or mentally.

Then, because I am tired and conflicted, I usually become passive/aggressive. I do not confront situations that upset/hurt me and just stuff it down. Usually with food.

So, again, I realize that I must change other things in my life to stop this cycle of overeating. It is not just a matter of saying I will eat less. Maybe it is, but I am just making this all too complicated? I do not know. I am waiting patiently for wisdom to come.

Onto a positive note:
I love that God speaks to me through His Word. I love that He gave us His Words for us to read at any moment. I love that He is faithful when we are not. I love that I am forgiven. Thank you Jesus!

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